Movie Review: “The Visit”

Movie Review: “The Visit”

If you want to get a good sense of how M. Night Shyamalan’s approval rating has gone down over the years, you only have to look at the way his movies have been advertised. Early on, posters and trailers were emblazoned with his name, entreating movie goers to come see what this genius has dreamt up this time. Now, in movies like After Earth, he is hidden away. His name is less prominent, almost like the studio is ashamed of his influence, and it’s not hard to understand why. Shyamalan has become a cultural punchline over the past fifteen years and, quite frankly, his new movie, The Visit, does nothing to change that perception.
 
In The Visit, a single mother (Kathryn Hahn) sends her two teenage children (Olivia DeJonge and Ed Oxenbould) to spend the week with her estranged parents (Deanna Dunagan and Peter McRobbie). The kids are initially excited to meet their grandparents and intend on making a film to document the experience and to possibly heal the wounds between their mother and her parents. Then, Nana and Pop Pop start acting really weird and the kids become more and more wary of them as their vacation progresses.
 
Of this film’s numerous problems, perhaps the most glaring is that it is all shot documentary-style from the point of view of a 15-year old girl and and 13-year old boy. The found footage genre can be grating in of itself, but add to the fact that everything is being done by the world’s two most pretentious teens, and the whole thing gets that much more unbearable.
 
Actually, let’s talk about those #teens for a second here. I hate them so much. They’re awful. They are worse than the kids in Jurassic World. The girl, Becca, is the aspiring filmmaker who thinks she’s Werner Fucking Herzog and every other word out of her mouth is so goddamned pompous that I spent half of the film wanting to slap the shit out of her. I understand that this is probably Shyamalan’s intention, as she does get a bit of the piss taken out of her about halfway through the film, but that doesn’t make her any less insufferable.
 
Then there’s the boy, Tyler. Or should I call him “T Diamond Stylus.” That’s his rap name because he’s a rapper. He raps and raps and raps and I could just barely take it. I mean, the fucking movie ends with him doing a rap that sums up the entire plot of the movie. That’s the last thing you see on screen! Can you believe that fucking shit?! Forcing audiences to sit through a white 13-year old’s freestyles should be classified as a crime against humanity.
 
It’s one of those things where, under a strong directorial hand, this is something that could have been interesting. A movie about kids trapped in what amounts to a haunted house with no method of escape, told one hundred percent from the kids’ vantage point? That sounds like it could be cool if done right. I’d watch that movie. But Shyamalan doesn’t do anything interesting with what he has. He just lets things play out fairly flatly and it feels like the work of an amateur, instead of a director’s ninth feature film.
 
And that brings us to the problems directly related to this being an M. Night Shyamalan movie. The Visit is another in a long line of disappointments from the once visionary director. It’s not quite as bad as The Happening or The Last Airbender, but coming from the same dude who made The Sixth Sense, it’s an incredible let down.
 
It also brings back the old Shyamalan staple of “The Twist.” I don’t feel bad about saying that there is a Twist in this movie since it is made by M. Night Shyamalan. He’s practically built his entire career on this single element so no one should be surprised when it happens here. I could almost hear the rest of the auditorium groan with a dejected “here we go again,” along with me when it occurred.
 
I think that it’s time we put the myth of M. Night Shyamalan being a good filmmaker to rest. He may have had a great idea once and enough talent to turn that idea into a wonderful reality, but the lack of anything of substance following that first outing should prove that he is the cinematic equivalent of a One Hit Wonder, the directorial counterpart to Right Said Fred. Maybe if this were his first movie, we could all look at it and say that this guy shows a lot of promise, but knowing his history, all that can be said is that he has officially worn out his welcome.

David Gallick
Many have been called “The Voice of the Generation.” David is not one of them, but he is more than content to be some schmoe prattling away on the internet and someday hopes to go on a spirit quest to find his soulmate. He cares more about Spider-Man than his own well being and can throw a football over those mountains over there.

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